Wow, just wow

Ok, I've been meaning to comment on this for a while, but couldn't get my thoughts around it... was really confusing.

A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila. If you don't know who she is, stop reading and immediately leave this site. For everyone else that's been exposed, I'm told in time you're vision will return (keep the faith.) So for those that may not have seen this amazing Tolstoy come to life and refuse to leave this page, let me explain. It's about a poor retarded girl who also suffers from that disease that makes you a whore (I forget the medical term.) She's surrounded by medical attendees from the Johns Hopkins University of desperate. And if you watch this for any extended amount of time 3 things may happen to you.

1. You are ashamed, which means you don't like taking pictures against a wet metal pole.
   
2. You are angry, because you can't find the remote to change the f*cking channel.
   
3. You will die.
   

I'm a fan of blithering television like the next person, but this takes it to the next level. It's like the ultimate train wreck that you just can't avert your eyes from.

More often than not, this is the programming I'll come across while flipping the channels. It's a bit sad. Last Saturday I ended up watching a show called Sheer Genius. It was about cutting hair, or styling hair. I watched this because in my 200+ channels of DirectTV, this was the most interesting program at the moment. F*ck me.

I think television these days is just a big retarded person on a street corner standing on a flaming box waving his hands back and forth with huge sausages in each hand yelling "I'm pretty! I'm pretty!" While Dick Cheney and company does whatever they want.

I have to say... this somewhat annoys me. It's like a decoy for the masses so you won't know what's happening around you. For instance, today we approved $162 billion dollars to fund the war in Iraq. Mind you, this is still listed under wartime funding and not victory funding... remember the "Mission Accomplished" banner on the USS Abraham Lincoln? Didn't realize the banner was about his morning bowel movement did you? Oh, and a Nimitz class carrier runs around $4.5 billion dollars, and we currently operate 12 carrier battle groups. On the flip side we approved $400 million dollars for new medical and energy research. $400 million, what, that's like Bill Gates mad money. Then we approved $210 million "to address the cost overruns in the 2010 census"... what? We're spending an additional $210 million to figure out why we're spending too much? The GAO (Government Accountability Office) said in a recent audit that, in the time we have given Pakistan $6 billion to pursue terrorists, there has been no proof that the money has been used to such effect. We're talking about a country that has the governmental annual budget of around $22 billion. WTF did they just spend $6 billion on if not terrorist hunting? Oh and by the way, before we bombed the crap out of Iraq they were pumping out 1.67 million barrels of oil per day. We're begging OPEC to increase output by an additional 2 million barrels a day... they've agreed to 10% of that figure. Now we're threatening Iran, who pumps out 4.15 million barrels a day (pre-bombing.) And while we're spending like mad, the House has approved a budget that will (hopefully) see a $22 billion surplus by the year 2012. $22 billion. That's just pitiful. I mean, that makes us the future Pakistan.

Thanks Tila Tequila... you blithering piece of crumpled metal on the Turnpike.

Baby showers r' us

Went to a nice baby shower yesterday with the family. Have to say, it was different from what I had expected. There was gift giving and cheer, and not at all like the 5 hour discussion on "female issues" as I had pictured in my head. My oldest one had fun with the other little girls at the party. In fact, she really liked them. On the drive home she asked if they were going to have another baby soon so she could go back and play at another baby shower. The baby was unusually quiet for the whole event. But as predicted, as soon as we got through the door at home... waaaaaah. Good boy Brian.

The best part about the party was near the end when we had cake... and no one noticed the little cream puffs and mini eclairs what were set out. I pretty much skipped dinner that night having my full of chilled puffy little treats... and there was beer! Ah, the perfect party.

Oh, and there was also a story about how "productive" someone could have been by implementing some slapping and typing, but I'll save that for another post :)

Sushi lunch

Ok, waited a whole 30 minutes or so, then broke down and got Sushi. You see above I'm sitting only inches away from my lunch. There's only a thin piece of glass separating me from my meal. I went to Bluefin for lunch and as always it was as Sushi should be. I have to say, in my experience you really need Japanese chefs to make good Japanese food. Now, there was a little while where we couldn't figure out if these guys were Japanese. Well, they are. Which also explains the deliciousness of their food. Yeah, pretty much Japanese from my interaction with them today.

I got the Sushi lunch with... crunchy spicy tuna rolls. I have to say, those crunchy spicy tuna rolls are made with love... the same love you would only give to a puppy.

Started with a salad and moved onto my Sushi. Then when I was pretty happy with my meal and ready to go, I got my fried banana in honey. I almost cried. I love that fried banana in honey... honestly I really do. Completely forgot about it, then BANG, fried banana with honey. God bless you Bluefin, God freakin' bless you.

Favorite food

I just want to take this moment to profess my love for Sushi. I love you Sushi, in all your forms , color and flavors. You are by far, my most favorite of foods. God I need to get some sushi tonight.

And it's just not the Sushi. I love almost all Japanese food. The noodles, the various types of Teriyaki, the sweet Tomago and their lovely desserts. I really enjoy Japanese desserts because they tend not to be overly sweet, but just sweet enough. Oh, and cooked eel with Teriyaki sauce over a bowl of rice... heaven. You have a nice crisp salad with your Sushi... just perfect for the summer. Again, seriously need to get some sushi tonight.

Link time

Ok, thought I would just post some enjoyable links. The first link is a solution to my nemesis, static electricity. The other link is evil.

Removes Static <-- not evil
Gives Static <-- totally evil

This next link has sheets of paper that you would print in color, cut, and create some highly detailed models courtesy of Yamaha. Current link is to a Panda

The next link is a time sink. It's a link to Kongregate which makes some pretty fun Flash based games. The most insidious is Desktop Tower Defense.

And the last link is a classic. It's the www.isgay.com site. This site will generate custom stories with a link to distribute.

sample story

Staying up late

I really need to get to bed earlier. I say this to myself all the time, but the reality is I'll stay up till about 1 or sometimes 2 in the morning. I get tired, and I know I should be going to bed but I just can't help myself. I was like this when I was a little kid... always wanting to stay up waaaay past bedtime. I would watch television into the wee hours of the night and sometimes into the morning. These days I'm mostly on the computer late at night. Not really doing anything productive, but just browsing or looking for nifty software or gadgets. But most of it is just filler. For instance, I think I spent about 2 hours last night categorizing music and making sure they all have decent album covers for iTunes. Then I ended up converting videos for my iphone, and trolled for some podcasts to listen to or watch. Downloaded a crapload of podcasts about cooking that I will probably never watch, and then watched some crap youtube. Oh, and I'm a bit of a sucker for imported anime. Yes, yes, these are those "cartoons". But they're more in the likes of Spirited Away, or Howl's Moving Castle. But these are series of usually 13 to 24 episodes or more... so just loads of video. The last one I watched was Denno Coil and Spice and Wolf. The first was about children trying to find their way to "the beyond", the second was about a wolf deity who joins a merchant trader after a pact they make in the 16th century, or something like that. It's odd, the Japanese are great animators and make some really stunning creations with deep compelling stories. In comparison, their live action shows and movies are pretty much horrible. When I think of Japanese television, Godzilla and Power Rangers come to mind... and that's it. But Japanese animation for me is just ripe with art. I know some of you are thinking about Pokemon when I say anime, but those are really for kids. The anime that hits their primetime (the ones I'm talking about) have movie level production values.

Anyways, lots and lots of ways to burn up time late at night to fight off having to go to bed. Oh Internet, as you mature even more in technology and bandwidth I'd be surprised if I'll get any sleep at all.

Hooky

Stayed out of work today and just got up from a pretty nice nap. It wasn't Caribbean breeze on a hammock nice but still nice. I have to watch out about oversleeping these days. I just get this complete discomfort in the end if I oversleep and my head feels like slosh afterwards. Then there's the risk of the grogginess lasting too long... not a fan of that either.

Anyways, ever watch the Discovery Channel or TLC? Well, my wife loves the medical shows on them. Last night they had this show about a kid whose bones wouldn't grow properly, so he kinda looked all... not right. It sucked, but no amount of surgery was ever going to make him normal. Then there was this operation where they separated this simeese (sp?) girl from India. They called her the girl with eight limbs. Yeah, that wasn't disturbing at all to watch after dinner. Then you get a slew of those extreme plastic surgery shows which just get a bit too graphic. It's more disturbing than any horror movie because it's real tissue. Yeah, picture that in your head... real tissue being cut and sewn back so some California troll can pretend she's 30 years younger. Good luck with that.

Now on the flip side, she'll get bored with Ice Road Truckers, Myth Busters, Extreme Engineering, or Battlestar. Yeah, Battlestar. You know, the best show on TV that no one is watching. And then there's the Doctor Who remake... which is just awesome. But no, if the girls at my home are in control of the TV, I run the risk of watching Tila Tequila. Yeah, Tila f*ckig Tequila. I'll reserve that for a separate post.

In the end, television is a bit of a disappointment for me. All the shows I enjoy I've already watched maybe 3 times or more over per episode. Even the commercials seem lame these days. I used to have a Wii before I sold it because I got bored of it (stupid, stupid, stupid.) I wish I had it again. I kinda enjoyed having the web browser on my TV through the Wii.

Oh well, I'm rambling. Sorry, this is pretty much a useless post. Not sure what I'm getting at besides the fact that I think Tila Tequila is whorey.

Godzilla is on Monster

Preferably some place with hot girls... again.

Monday, no

Why is it Monday already? That's the thought that goes through my head on Sunday evening. By Monday morning I'm already defeated and in my car. Why do we work so much as a society? In those European Latin countries, I hear they have two hour lunches and months worth of vacation time instead of our piddly two weeks. In some places, an 8 hour work day is unheard of. And the concept of the afternoon nap? Sign me up.

I mean honestly, what are we doing? Are we just so much more inefficient at work that we have to do so much more of it? Are we making sure we have enough industrial capacity for world war 3? Do we just like speeding through life until we're 50 and wondering what just happened? Are we working to pay off our credit spending because we like stuff, lots and lots of stuff? And where is the payoff for all this work that we do as a society? Look at the Japanese. They work more than we do, and one has to wonder what their payoffs as a society really are. Sure they have almost no crime compared to us, but are they really better off? Yes, it would be cool to live in the technology center of the world, and experience their almost limitless creativity when it comes to consumer goods. But I don't think I want to work so hard that dying in your office of a heart attack is so common, that they actually have a term for it. I'd rather live in the Italian countryside, lying down on the grass and staring at clouds that may or may not look like bunnies. Right now, I'm sitting in my office and looking out the window and NOTHING looks like a bunny. It's all kinda gray and vomitty looking. Would be so much better on a grassy field.

Mondays... what a crock.

Friday, yes

When I get home, I'm going to first, change into shorts and t-shirt. I will then get myself a nice cool drink, and just sit down and smile for a few minutes. Then the rest of the evening is a free for all. I may watch tv, a movie, play a little with the kids, maybe browse a little. I will do nothing that resembles work what so ever. In fact, now when I think about it, I'm going to pick-up some double fudge chocolate ice-cream on my way home. Oh wait, no, I'm going to Dairy Queen and getting a box of Buster Bars! Yeah, Buster Bars... love those things.

I'm going to stay up late, watch those super late night infomercials and have a gin and tonic. And when the kids are asleep, I'm going to commit as many dastardly crimes as I can on GTA4 while intoxicated.

Friday, the only day I can reliably count on to make me happy.

Screw you GOP

OK, $61.81 to fill up about 14 1/4 gallons. There isn't a middle finger big enough on this planet that I can shove into Bush and Cheneys face. Oil reserves in Iraq almost equal in size to the Saudi fields, mostly untapped. Poor regulation of speculators driving up the per barrel price. Instead of 80billion dollars set aside for solar, geothermal, wind, nuclear, fusion power, electric cars, battery research, etc., we send it to Iraq. And even if you drill in ANWR or the Florida shelf, let's be honest, it isn't going to reduce the price of oil. So here's a big f*ck you Bush and Cheney, and that's coming from a Republican.

Bad at keeping in touch

Hopefully, this image of a helpless little hamster will distract you from the fact that I'm really bad at keeping in touch. Now, those of you who are within 3 years of contact with me, you're OK. I still remember to call and write. Those who are in that 3+ year area... well, damn, that has to be the cutest hamster ever!

I'm trying to be better about it. In fact, this blog is now one of the keystones of my lines of communications. Actually, one of the reasons for me to write is because I was recently contacted by a friend who had moved all the way to Arizona. It's been too long since I've talked to Mel, and then a week later I meet someone else I've neglected to call. Sorry you two, it has been too long. Seriously, that hamster has the cutest face.

Now, for those that I've met recently and consider to be really valuable friends, I promise to be around. After all, good friendships are so hard to find these days. I think I'm going to name that hamster Billy.

Sonic... not so good

They put up a Sonic near me, and it opened for business about a week or two ago. I've always been curious about them, mostly because I've never tried one before. If you read their literature they tout freshness and "made on the spot" goodness. Every evening as I drive by it's been packed, so I keep on driving, but this morning I decided to give it a go.

It's set up as a drive in for food. There isn't any indoor seating and the whole building itself is one big food prep area. You pull into one of the stalls and place your order. They would then bring your food out to your car. So if you don't have a car to eat in, you're kinda out of luck. There is an outdoor patio to sit and eat at, but I wouldn't recommend it in such hot and muggy weather.

I choose the drive-thru and got a breakfast sandwich with coffee and tator tots. From what I can tell, their taste of freshness is the same taste that I would get from McDonalds or Burger King, or any other fast food joint. I honestly could not tell any difference, never mind detecting any form of freshness. All in all, it left a greasy after taste in my mouth, and on that I don't think I'm going to bother to go back. They didn't even have decent coffee, the backbone of any good breakfast. So now I'm full and feeling gross. I think I'm going to skip lunch and find me a nice shaded place outside to vomit.

Childhood

It's strange. It took me years, and I mean years to NOT have dreams about my childhood home in Canada. The odd thing is, it wasn't even the last home I had been in. It was maybe the 2nd last home until I moved to the US. And then I had dreams about this home for about 5 years after that. What's that about?

I think maybe that's when I may have had the best times as a kid. I lived in Ladner, BC. As I look back, it was a great place for a kid to grow up. Plenty of places to play at, the climate was great, school was so close I could ride my bike there every day. Ladner was a small fishing community. We had a dock where small trawlers would port in. And because of the great public transport system, as a 13 year old I would bus with my friends to Richmond and sometimes the city itself. Yes, it was so safe that parents let 13 year old kids bus out to other towns for the whole day. It was great.

I lived in a home on Ceder Tree Lane. Not sure why I remember that street so well. If I rode my bike down 47A Avenue to the east I would hit the elementary school. My friends all lived within bike or walking range, and we would just play all day during the summers. Looking back, it seemed like magic.

There used to be a small corner store that had some arcade machines. We'd spend hours on a hot day sitting on their sidewalk drinking Slushies and buying suger sticks. It was also my first introduction to the video game. My first game of Donkey Kong was there, as was Kung Fu and a totally awesome StarTrek game. Oh and my favorite candy of all time, the "Fun Dip". This candy would come in 3 compartments, each containing a sugery flavor. You would get this dip stick that was also made of suger. You'd suck on the stick, dip it in the powdery suger flavor, suck and repeat the process until totally hyped on suger.

Anyways, if you want to see this house that wouldn't leave my dreams, go to google maps- http://maps.google.com/. Then go to the satellite view. In the entry field for Search Map, put in this set of co-ordinates- 49.089029,-123.070787

You'll drop right onto my best childhood years.

Happy Fathers Day

This will be my sixth year as a dad and my tenth year as a husband... I think. It's also been about one year since I started wondering if there was anything more to life. I also have been having trouble figuring out what "more" is. Could be why I've been in this brain loop for about a year now. There's very little adventure in my life these days, mostly because stability has been the necessity (you know, kids and all.). But in my brain, stability also equates to words like stale and deterioration. I've also been at my job for five years now. That's actually pretty long for me. I get very restless after five years, and I'm definitely past my expiration date at my current job.

So back to the brain loop. I'm now going to look for some happiness. Not just for myself, but the type you can share. I know I'm in a funk, and I've decided to stop obsessing over it. It's time I spent some real effort into figuring out what I want. Hopefully, I'll find out what I want soon.

Oh, and about Fathers Day. The most joy in my life, right now, absolutely comes from my kids.

Still hot

Today was another humid and hot day. Not as hot as the previous week, but still in the high 80's. You factor in the humidity and it feels unbearable. You see, I have a real aversion to heat. I like my air-conditioning. Without it, I'm pretty much a useless, miserable troll. So thank you Willis Carrier, for keeping me sane and my ice-cream nice and... ice-creamy.

Waaaaahffle

Sometimes the only thing that will make a bad morning go away are waffles, bacon and eggs.

I have to admit, I did feel a bit better afterwards. But ultimately, food shouldn't be the solution to my funk. Well, unless it comes with ice-cream.

Are you kidding me

OK, in for about 10 minutes at work and I'm already annoyed. Let me tell you how my morning starts. This is the good part were you wake up and the temperature is just right. It's so perfect that you just want to nap for another hour or two because it is so blissfully comfortable. I mean lazy cat comfortable. Now fast forward to the office. And I'll list my morning concerns by order of questions.

1) Why do we give people computers? It is absolutely clear to me that most people can't use them. For the most part, it's just a glowing box to light up that stupid look on their face. How can you not know how to use Word, or Excel, or even find a file? And these are the same idiots complaining that their computer is too slow. Yeah, the computer is slow. I think you're the one that's slow you retard.

2) Why bother with office printers when clearly they could just use crayons? We have these expensive office printers that pretty much can do a million functions. We use maybe 3 functions. When they give an error message they actually draw a picture on the large LCD screen to instruct you on how to resolve the issue... you know, it needs your help because IT DOESN'T HAVE HANDS. They still come to me for help, or leave the machine in its' incapacitated state for the next person. Jesus man, the thing literally just drew you a picture!

3) Can you help me to co-ordinate because that's my job? Are you kidding me? People need to get some big mits or something to pick up the ball. It is not my job to answer your stupid blithering questions all day about your function, because I have a function of my own. And you know what, it's not to spend all day confirming in my head that you're a jackass.

Ohhhhh, per criminy piddle flip blaaahhhhh!

Yeah, that's my first 10 minutes.

Lunch habits

So I had lunch with someone today. Let's call him... Sung. Sung has an unusual eating habit, and I'm wondering if anyone else has the same habit. He will separate the consumption of his meal. He will eat the fries, by themselves. When he is done with the fries, he will eat the sandwich. When he is done with the sandwich, he will then pop the straw into the soda and consume that. Yes, he actually will not drink while eating. I can only imagine the reason for this separation is, little elves in his stomach are sorting the meal for recycling.

Drive of doom

Driving home last night I thought I would at least make a stop to get something to drink, so I tried coconut juice. For anyone that is familiar with Asian drinks, you'll understand the many assorted forms of juice that is just not found in western societies. Most of them are actually naturally sweet, while others have very unique flavors not of this world.
After I purchased my tasty beverage and was on my way home, God got very pissed. The sky clouded into a dark doom while the wind picked up. Rain then started to pour down to where visibility is maybe 50 feet. Lightning was flashing just above me turning the view into this bright pink/purple color. It was actually pretty, but I couldn't untie the beauty from the fact that it could vaporize me, so I just drove crouched in my car. Yes, yes, this is what you get for working late asshat. For miles, the power was out and intersections were operating on pure anarchy or being handled by police. Debris would just blow sideways into cars on the road, littered by branches. Of course, as I pulled into my driveway all was well again. Thanks God, not cool.

Tired.. going home.

OK, it's just past 7 and I'll be heading out soon. Not exactly a fulfilling day. I'll be honest. I've been in a funk lately that I just can't shake off. More and more, I feel like- yes, my day should be fulfilling. It's not.

I would be really happy right now if I had some sushi or tempura... the good stuff. Not something from a supermarket or buffet, or those pseudo Japanese places run by... well, not Japanese people. But I'm tired. So I'm going to drive about 40 minutes home, then microwave some dinner and spend some time with the kids. They'll want to play, and I have to play with them. After all, this time is so finite. They're at this age for a blink of an eye, and it'll never come back. I may just watch TV with them in the end, but you do need to spend time with them. After all, I haven't seen them all day. After that, I'll try to put some time aside for myself. Usually by then it's about 10. I may not sleep till 12. I just can't get myself to just fall asleep after spending all my awake time at work. Feels like you're being cheated at life somehow.

Cheated at life somehow... that sounds about right. That feels like where I'm at.

Aaarrghblewuuu

Oh what a rubbish day this is turning out to be, and it isn't even lunch time yet. I need to leave the office today, if not just for a short while. You see, some of the people I work with, for a lack of a better word are twonks. Actually, I'm not sure if twonks is a real word, but it sounds right. If I worked as a Disney Imagineer I would imagine I would call my fellow Imagineers funktaculars. But I don't work there. I work with twonks.

This isn't to say they're all like that. Like any place you have your few standouts that are as reliable as can be. But even after time, the stress wears and your best fail.

Anyways, back to the rubbish day, or morning. Already have unrealistic timelines. It's hot as hell outside and I think I'm going through the early stages of some kind of mid-life crisis. I don't want a Porsche yet, but in the end it may be the only thing that will make me happy again.

So to recap thus far, hot, annoyed, unhappy, no Porsche and twonks.

My First Entry

I've been on the net now for a while... I think, a long while. And though I've worked around the net, played on it, used it and had it use me, found it to be an essential part of my life- I've never shared on it. On a more broader note, I've never really shared at all as it pertains to my life’s experiences. I mean honestly, who cares. Out of the billions of people on this rock, who cares what one miniscule little blip out of the eons thinks about anything, about anything at all. I mean, I think eating raw oysters is morally wrong... blip.

Even as I type, I still think that is true (about the blip and oysters.) But I've found in my degenerative age of oldness that maybe my sharing is more therapeutic than anything else. Yes, that's it. This will be completely therapeutic. So here I start into this vastness of air, filling in my little breaths bit by bit.

So here goes- my attempt at self therapy.